I think I might have stifled myself into what I thought a book blogger should be than who's truly me. I look back at some of my reviews and i'm stunned of how little of me I actually see. WTF! No one but my immediate family and 2 friends (that don't read and care) know about my blog, and none of them read it. I think if some read it they wouldn't believe it is my blog. A little about myself and my quirkiness: I cuss like a sailor. I dress fashionably but conservatively (my husbands calls it a classy look). Imagine a conservatively dressed women cussing like a sailor..that's me. I also ramble shamelessly and have been known to do random dancing in odd occasions. I am also a master bullshitter. I can bullshit with the best of them. On the other hand I'm moody, and I hate order. Tell me to turn left and I will turn right, just because. I totally feel like I am censoring myself and that is something I never do, but for some reason I do here.
I'm truly hoping 2012 is a better blogging year for me. I'm predicting it will be. I hope this doesn't bother anyone, but if it does O fucking well. Can't please everyone.
Oh, I've been struggling with this, too, writing about things I think others want to write about rather than what I want to write about. Plowing through these reviews of books that I didn't connect with, good or bad, because they are current and important and everybody is reading them. I took a step back, and reassessed, and dove back in. I thought about my blog as an extension of me: if a book doesn't say anything about me or how I view the world (agrees with it or goes against it) then I don't bother with it.
ReplyDeleteDon't give up! Just step back, and look with fresh eyes.
FWIW, I love your blog--just as it is.
I agree with you. This year was awful for me in reading/blogging because of other stuff going on, but I would feel anxiety about it and WOW, that's ridiculous! I feel like if I'm not posting reviews multiple times a week and reading all the up and coming books that I don't "fit in" with the community. It's ridiculous. I need to just focus on making my blog what I want just for me without worrying about any pressure!
ReplyDeleteWow! This is jus what I needed to read today! Thanks so much for the post and comments. I have definitly been in a reader/blog slump the last few months. It's felt like a chore rather than something I love to do. I like you hit it right on the head-your personality should not get lost in the review. Very little of my true self has come through my reviews because....well I'm not sure why. Enough! I look forward to your future reviews and you've inspired me to make a few changes too!
ReplyDeleteThank you!
Never be afraid to be you. We will still love you... probably even more! :)
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